“I wish I could just look back at this and feel happy.” 

I don’t know if it was the INSANE amount of water I managed to intake from 4pm- now (12:58am) that is keeping me awake or the “happy feeling”. 

Hopefully it’s the latter. 

Today, after we got home from grocery shopping, I suggested to Ben we go outside and just lay on the grass. (I’m weird, I do this all of the time and I tell Ben, all of the time, he should join me) I am so happy. I feel almost at ease, which is so weird for me. 

Life as a newlywed for me has been absolutely terrible until the recent week. I confronted my new mother in law about literally EVERYTHING, I managed to creep on myself from two or so years ago and hate my body as of now, etc. So in short, not a good start. 

But it’s this stuff, that Ben and I completely survive through, that makes me realize I have met my soulmate. It’s days like this I just CHERISH. I don’t want to go to bed basically. Days where there isn’t ONE SINGLE problem, are golden. 

I can almost feel the creativity flowing through me after this huge watergate. 

Be prepared Tumblr and Instagram, possibly facebook, for the influx of doodles.

AKA; GUYS MY LIFE FEELS COMPLETE. 

Finally. 

I can feel Ben more and more pushing me to go for my dreams as I manage to push him for his. But really he doesn’t really need pushing (The band Open Letters that he is apart of with his brother is getting to be AMAZING. I find myself just randomly on Ben’s Soundcloud.) 

I think I can finally breathe guys. 

I mean I still need to get to the doctor’s office soon for my anxiety. The little things still have echos. But dude. Life is beautiful. I finally feel like I am here. 

Here is so sweet and beautiful.